Slay Your Fears with Meradeth Houston

We're building up to the release of Empath, and I've asked some of my fellow authors to take the reins and talk about the things that scare them. It's illuminating to see that we're all afraid of (basically) the same thing, and yet inspiring to see how others overcome that fear.

Without further ado...

Fear of the Unknown

Meradeth Houston

Thanks so much for hosting me today! It’s always a treat to get to hang out with the awesome S. Usher Evans!! :)

Okay, so thinking about what scares me was not an easy thing to do. Seriously, I kind of try to avoid thinking about what scares me. Who wants to dwell on that? But, I had to think about what does really freak me out and there’s no denying that I definitely have a few things hiding in my closet that would love to jump out and freak me out completely. The biggest thing?

The fear of failure.

There, I said it. I’m afraid of completely crash-and-burn-there-are-no-more-chances failing. (Yeah, I’m sure I’m not alone in this one!)

So, what does that mean though? For me, it means that I am doggedly determined. I don’t give up. Even when, really, I probably ought to. I would be happier if I just walked away. But for some reason, I absolutely have to complete whatever it is that I put myself up to. Even if it makes me miserable. Even if I would find something else amazing if I did. But failure is just not an option, even if it should be. Because failing is weakness and public humiliation, and all things horrible. So I keep at it, even if it just might kill me.

This fear has pushed me to levels I never thought I’d reach. I’m a professor in my chosen field, with my doctorate. My fifth novel is set to release this summer. I am celebrating my 12th year of marriage. But, there are times when the price has been steep. I’ve lost chunks of my soul along the way, and have only recently started working to get them back. I don’t sleep a lot, watch TV, do much socially, or have much of a life, mainly because my goals are always there, reminding me that if I fail, all hell will break loose in my life. So I keep going.

Occasionally people think this is a good thing. Society has labeled me things like a “high achiever” and other such nonsense. I’m honestly not so sure. The cost doesn’t outweigh the benefits many days. But keeping the fear at bay? That’s all I can strive for.

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Meradeth Houston is the author of the Sary Society books (Colors Like Memories, The Chemistry of Fate, and Surrender the Sky), as well as An Absence of Light. Her next novel, Travelers, is set to release in August, 2015!

Find Meradeth Houston online at: www.MeradethHouston.com

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